Don't Pass out when Raditz and Vegeta are about!
by KaibaGirl17
Summary: Once again, our favorite trio goes to bar on their free time...


A/N: Once again, there is NO excuse for this. But, also once again, I was bored out of my mind. Let me know what you think of it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Vegeta, Raditz, or Nappa-",

Raditz: "Who'd wanna own THAT?" (points at Nappa)

Nappa: "Shut up, you stupid third-class!"

Raditz: "Is that all you can say, Nappa?"

Vegeta: "Apparently it is".

Nappa: "HEY!"

(Me, Raditz, and Vegeta start laughing hysterically and Nappa starts cursing angrily)

Vegeta: "Shut up, Nappa and let her finish the disclaimer so we can get on with this".

Me: "Thanks Vegeta, I do not own DBZ or any of the characters, Akira Toriyama does".

Nappa: "Let's just get this over with".

...

Making their way to the back of the dimly lit tavern, the three Saiyan males sat down in their seats and ordered their drinks. "I'll get the first round but after that, I'm broke", Raditz informed Vegeta and Nappa. "You're _always_ broke", Vegeta sneered. "How can you be broke all ready?" Nappa demanded, "We just got paid _yesterday."_ Before Raditz could answer, Vegeta mockingly stated, "He bought shampoo, conditioner, hot oil treatments, an industrial strength hairbrush and comb, an emergency back up industrial strength hairbrush and comb...", "Knock it off, Vegeta!" Raditz snapped. "He's got a point, Furball. You're like a female fussin' with that mop of yours", Nappa added. "I AM NOT!" Raditz huffed. Their drinks arrived and the waitress shot Raditz a murderous look when he swatted her backside as she turned to leave after placing the drinks on their table. All three Saiyans chuckled at her reaction. However, Radiz's amusement was short lived.

A large green-skinned creature with a face that looked like a walrus staggered up to the Saiyans' table. He was obviously **very** drunk! "Hey there, Beautiful!" the tusked creature slurred at Raditz. Nappa and Vegeta burst into laughter. "I AM NOT A FEMALE! Get away from me, you drunk _baka_!" Raditz snarled. "Don't try foolin' me, I can see all that long, purty hair", Walrus snorted. "I'm warning you, back off!" Raditz growled, balling up his fists. "Aw, I **love** it when you females play hard to git. Here, plant one on me right here!" the drunk insisted, pointing to the left side of his face. The walrus creature crashed into the back wall of the tavern when Raditz's right fist connected with the drunkard's jaw. "Are you all right there, Miss?" Vegeta teased. "Yeah, you coulda messed up your do carrying on like that", Nappa cut in. "Both of you shut the hell up!" Raditz fumed. "_We_ can't help it if you look like a female with all **that**", Nappa persisted, pointing at Raditz's long, spiky hair. Raditz stuck out his chest, lifted up his chest, and flexed his muscles, "THERE AREN'T ANY FEMALES BUILT LIKE **THIS**!" Vegeta gasped for air. "Put those down! Didn't you take a shower before we left the ship?" "Yes!" Raditz snapped angrily. The long-haired Saiyan sniffed the air and coughed himself. "Nappa, it's **you**!"

"What's wrong?" the bald Saiyan asked. "YOU **SMELL**!" Vegeta and Raditz shouted in unison. "Aww, it's not **that** bad", Nappa snorted. "Nappa, you reek!" Raditz growled. "Go sit somewhere else, Nappa", Vegeta ordered. "Hmmph! I'm goin'. It ain't my fault you and the broad here can't handle a little honest sweat", Nappa grumbled. Raditz directed an obsene gesture with a single raised finger at Nappa. "I appreciate the offer, but you're not my type", Nappa snickered. "WHAT!" Raditz screeched and jumped to his feet. "Sit down, Raditz", Vegeta ordered. Muttering under his breath, Raditz sat back down in his seat as Nappa walked away, chuckling. "It's surprising that vultures aren't circling overhead at the ceiling", Raditz mused, fanning at the air. "Even **THEY** wouldn't touch Nappa", Vegeta declared.

At that moment, an attractive female walked up to the Saiyans' table. Long, black hair framed her golden-skinned face. She pointed to the seat Nappa had vacated. "Is this seat taken?" she asked. "Have a seat, take a load off", Raditz offered. The woman suddenly glared at Raditz. "TAKE A LOAD OFF? Are you saying I'm FAT?" she demanded. Tugging at the back of Raditz's hair, the Saiyan prince made it look as if Raditz was nodding. "Oooh! I NEVER!" the female screeched angrily, walking away. "And with **that** BIG BUTT, you never will!" Vegeta called after her. Her golden skin flushed with anger as the woman whipped back around. Vegeta pointed at Raditz. Before the stunned Raditz could speak in his defense, the female gave him a sharp slap across the left side of his face and stormed off. Vegeta roared with laughter, "You walked right into that one, Raditz!" A string of curses was Raditz's reply.

"Hey guys!" an attractive, slim female called as she came up to Vegeta and Raditz's table. She had light green skin, bright blue hair, and intense almond-shaped blue eyes. "Hello!" the long-haired Saiyan greeted. Vegeta just nodded. Raditz shot Vegeta a warning look. He knew the Saiyan prince was going to do _something_, there was just no telling what. Vegeta tried to feign an innocent look, but it wasn't convincing in the least.

"So, what do you guys do?" the blue girl asked eagerly. "Uh, we help with planetary population control", Raditz said. That actually didn't sound too bad. "Oooh! So you help figure out ways for people to help control the overuse of planet's natural resources by controlling their population growth, huh?" the female asked. Vegeta answered her before Raditz could respond, "We control populations by deestroying all sentinent life on selected planets. If it _breathes_, we **kill** it!" The blue-haired girl turned pale. "Oh! My friends are calling me! Gotta go!" she scrambled from her seat, dropping her bag, and quickly scooping it up again as she ran. "You did it **again**, Vegeta!" Raditz accused. "Always happy to help", Vegeta quipped. "THAT'S IT! I'm outta here!" the long-haired Saiyan fumed. "Next time I go somewhere like this, I'll come alone!" Raditz got to his feet and looked around. He spied Nappa snoring at a nearby table, "Let's get Nappa and go!" Something rattled at the young Saiyan's feet. Raditz looked down, "Vegeta, you scared that poor girl so bad, she dropped her face paints". Looking at the dozing Nappa and then back down at the cosmetics, Raditz suddenly had a wicked idea. He'd been the butt of enough jokes, it was time for someone else to suffer. When Raditz looked up at Vegeta, the evil smirk that met his gaze told him that they both had the smae idea...

"Wake up, Nappa. Time to go", Raditz growled, "I am NOT going to carry you out AGAIN!" "Move your worthless hide, Nappa. Frieza won't tolerate us being late", Vegeta ordered...

Nappa walked through the corridors of Frieza's ship on the way to the Saiyan quarters. All along the way, everyone stopped and gaped at him. 'Don't know what to think of a Saiyan Elite, do they?' he thought to himself.

Suddenly, Frieza himself appeared. Nappa quickly bowed. "Lord Frieza...", he began. "What is this foolishness, Nappa?" Frieza interrupted, "Am I supposed to be _amused_ by this?" "Sir?" the confused Nappa asked. "Go wash your face immediately!" the Ice-Jin ordered.

Nappa arrived at the Saiyan quarters and walked into the bathing facility. The bald Saiyan gaped in shock at his reflection. His eyelids were coated with bright purple eyeshadow. Thick black eyeliner rimmed his eyes. Red blush had been applied so heavily that he looked like he had been slapped on both cheeks. Glittery pink lipstick completed his garish look. **Everyone** on the ship had seen him...

"RADITZ! VEGETA! I'M GONNA KILL YOU!" Nappa roared.


End file.
